It’s been a long summer and one of the strangest of my life. Not only have we had the Covid-19 pandemic to deal with, but then I went and got breast cancer and had to have chemotherapy, which of course meant shielding from the virus too.
My oncologist was very clear before I started the chemo. HE insisted that I MUST go into shielding from Covid as my immune system would be virtually gone. So, I agreed of course and have spent the whole of the summer indoors just about. Not that I had the energy to go and do very much anyway. You hear various stories about chemo – some people are really sick while others seem to sail through with minimal issues. I landed somewhere in the middle. The first session wasn’t too bad, although I felt a bit rough the first week.The second one was a bit worse and by the time I had the last treatment I was feeling rotten. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t sick, the anti-sickness meds and the steroids took care of that. But I just felt drained – my energy disappeared completely. My heart raced, palpatations jumping out of my chest, my head was woolly, I was dizzy and the injections I had to administer to myself every day just became something to dread. I swear if I’d had to do one more injection, I just couldn’t had done it. The pain in my bones was nasty, though completely what was expected as it was the job of the injections to stimulate my bone marrow to increase my immunity. But it was awful – I had a pulsating feeling travelling up and down my whole body and my head felt like it was in a vice all the time!
I know it’s a treatment for something much worse, but goodness it’s hard going. I cry now when I see the cancer ads on TV where small children are being subjected to chemo – it breaks my heart that those little ones have to endure that. Life is so unfair to them.
Anyway, my own personal chemo is now finished. My head is less woolly again and I feel OK. I am told I can start to come out of shielding as long as I am cautious. Living where I do, it’s jammed packed with tourists who think this is a normal summer in Benidorm, so I will be avoiding the town centre still. However, it will be a delight to start going for longer walks in the countryside again. Starting this week!
While I’ve been inside, I’ve had a lot of thinking time and also time to observe other people, so I have lots of thoughts I want to put down in this blog! And I will be doing that over the next few weeks.
Meanwhile, I am drawing and walking and living again, which is great. I started a new course of tablets yesterday that are supposed to have nasty side effects, but I’m being positive and hoping they won’t be too bad. They are OEstrogen blockers, used as a prevention against the cancer returning.
Onwards and upwards!
Barbara Murray Art 